Days 632 - 669

Post date: Apr 27, 2018 1:20:27 AM

TUESDAY - THURSDAY

So what does it mean to surrender your life to your Higher Power? It means accepting that His plan is better than your plan. It's accepting and acting on the pull in your life. It means taking steps and having faith the path is before you, even if you can't see it.

For the last 12 years, I've worked at Marist School in Atlanta, GA. It was my place of refuge. It was my calm in the storm of my eternal chaos. And then this past year, it wasn't. My home became my place of refuge, my calm, my home. At the end of long days, I came home to people who loved me and actually wanted me around.

Now, I love teaching, don't get me wrong. I love my students, genuinely. I work with some pretty amazing people. However, I feel like God is calling me to other things, specifically to run my company, NetherCream. NetherCream is good, completely. I realized others don't see the world as I do. They don't have to, but I don't have to be a part of something that no longer meets my needs or shares my values.

And, yes, it is super scary. It's like my phone is buzzing and God's calling. Do I answer or simply hit the "Sorry, I can't talk right now." button? Well, I accepted the call and all the unknown which comes with it. And it's so scary, but that's ok. It isn't chaos. It isn't drama, it's God's plan and it is moving forward.

Maybe it's my midlife crisis, only I don't feel in crisis. I've never felt more in control of my life. Stepping away from something, trying not to please everyone, taking time for myself. It feels amazing!

So my plans for the upcoming year:

1. Be a stay at home mom, for the first time in a very long time. I plan on enjoying the time I have with my children.

2. Write. A lot. Be looking for more Jacob Doesn't Read and Inherited Codependency Support books.

3. Run my company NetherCream. I'm truly honored to have this task. It may include dressing up as an elephant for amusing commercials about the "elephant in the room."

4. Keep working on my recovery. There isn't a day that goes by when I don't assess how I'm doing or things I need to change.

5. Go to the temple more often. I love finding my ancestors and connecting families. It's so much fun! On that note, I also need to reconnect with family here.

God, my life is yours, completely. Your hands are good. Your hands are strong. Your hands hold me up. Your hands, I'm in your hands.